I finally did it. My first mammogram. Scary? ...not really. Painful? ...more like uncomfortable. Expensive? ...about the price of a couple of months insurance premiums.

Last week I went in for my very first mammogram. No big deal, right?  A vast majority of women in the US will do this in their lifetime. As a "mammogram virgin" I was a bit unsure of what to expect, and it seems that those who have gone before me all seem to have their own experience that usually includes, "...then they smashed the my boob flat as a pancake!"

As I entered the clinic, I noticed that it was quiet, not brightly lit but soothing. The lady at the front desk was very nice. I filled out the information sheet, and she took me back to get dressed. "Remove all clothing above the waist, and put on the hospital gown... opening in the front. Then you can have a seat in this next room." I did as I was told, and was quickly taken back to a room by a young (and by "young" I mean "shouldn't need to have her own mammogram for another 20 years!") lady.  She was polite and very sweet as she described what was going to happen.

What I wasn't prepared for was her cold hands as she positioned my breast where she needed it to be. After multiple pap tests and giving birth twice, I'm used to doctors and nurses in certain areas... not so used to them in the "other" area. Weird.  But the best part of the day was when she asked me if I was the wife of her husbands work associate. ...Yep, nice to meet you. I'd shake your hand, but it doesn't seem necessary since we've already been intimate.

I redressed, thanked them all, and left after they promised that they would call as soon as the doctor read the mammogram. They kept their promise, and called to tell me I needed to come back and have them "look at" my left breast again. "This is normal," she promised, "for first timers. The doctors don't have last year's pictures to compare it to, so they want to make sure that any little issues are covered."

This week, I went back in and had them "take another picture," sat in another waiting room, and then was told they were sending me to the hospital. "Don't worry, this is just routine." The mammogram didn't get the detail that the doctor needed, so you will need an ultra sound. I asked her what percentage of first timers go to get an ultrasound and she said, "about 10 percent." Okay...  so I'm special.

I have not had an ultrasound since my last pregnancy 14 years ago. So I called my husband to tell him what was going on, text my girlfriend (who currently had breast cancer and is undergoing treatment), and drove to the hospital a few blocks away.  "It's just routine," I kept telling myself...  no worries.

I took my papers to the desk, and the lady there showed me where to undress (I got 2 robes this time), and where to wait. So I dressed and waited. ...and waited....  and waited....  After I had convinced myself that all was fine, I was left in a room with no radio or TV to sit and think about why I was there.  Many many thinks go through your mind at this point. Not the least of which was, "I should have got that other life insurance policy."

I finally got into have the ultrasound, the doctor (whom I have yet to meet) read it, and wants me to come back in 6 months to see if there are any changes. Apparently what he thinks he saw were harmless cysts, but he wants to check again... I'm not sure if he needs a new car, or he's just real thorough.

Anyway... God is good. I have a few more bills to pay, but I now have time to go ahead and find another life insurance policy.